Thursday, 17 March 2016

Bowled Over

Here I am in my Bowler Hat! I’ve already put in £1000 not to have to wear it – but I will if someone matches that. Come on now you want to see me out on course in that don’t you!!
Your sponsorship has been unbelievably generous thank you – and who knows I may feel obliged to wear it in any case … if I can raise just a few more pennies!

For everyone who’s asking – no I’m not training in my suit. And I won’t be! I’m still wearing it for work at the moment – I am a Yorkshire man after all. Deep pockets, short arms and all that. I might take the Bowler for a spin nearer the time – I can imagine the story in the local paper now.
“Unidentified flying saucer spotted low over Penistone – the flying saucer, which looked to the untrained eye rather like a bowler hat, was spotted moving at great speed along the ridge at Royd Moor. A mystery being seemed to be running directly underneath it. Was this you or was it an alien life form?” 

And were I to wear it in town I can imagine the abuse I’d receive – it might sound rather like “bowler hat” actually! Reminds me of an old favourite letter to the Times from a Mrs Hat. She’d replied to the company who’d sent her a letter mistakenly addressed to Mrs Watt that her name was in fact Hat. The next letter came addressed to Mrs Hatnotwatt  !!!
Training is going okay – a few decent long runs and I’m warming up with the Rome Marathon 2 weeks before London. I won’t be wearing the suit in Roma. Probably a toga.
Many of you have pointed out the obvious risk of running in a suit – chafing! Yes I will chafe – no it’s not pleasant to think about – not even for me! That’s why I need to raise a few pounds to make it worthwhile. I will be taking industrial quantities of chip fat (or maybe Vaseline) with me … enough said!
And the Bowler will be hot to put it mildly. I’ve considered drilling a hole in the top – but thought that as the steam escaped through it I’d look like a whistling kettle. It’s also been suggested I take a briefcase (not in London, too many people and don’t want to hurt anyone except me) or a copy of the FT. Problem with the latter is that my shirt and suit sleeves will act like drainpipes for all the sweat and steam not able to escape elsewhere. Alas my suit is not made from the ubiquitous “wicking” material.
So I leave you contemplating my fate ……

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